Very important questions

In talking to a lot of people while I travel there have been a lot of good questions about Zombies. Apparently, Zombies are looked at differently around the world. I shall share some of these (very serious, yet important) discussions with you now:

1) Are Zombies and Mummies related at all? This was a discussion with my friend Edi (who was kind enough to let me couchsurf at his place!). We got into a really good discussion of how there are 2 types of mummies. The wrapped-up kind (like king-tut) where their organs are removed and they come back to life to wreck havoc on the world. And the “frozen” kind– where their body is in almost a hibernation state. We decided that the “king-tut” variety can only be like Zombies because they were DEAD and are coming back to life, as where the frozen kind were never dead to begin with…. just MOSTLY dead. And, as we all know, to be MOSTLY dead is SLIGHTLY alive*. With this said, we also agreed that Mummies aren’t contagious like Zombies. They just wander around. I guess it could be argued that Jesus was a mummy– not a zombie. Because he didn’t bite/infect anyone.

2) Can Vegetarian humans make Zombie vegetarians? Actually, this is a great question! Zombies are brainless. They are going to be in auto-pilot mode. So does this mean that vegetarian friends won’t crave brains, but cauliflower instead? Let’s hope so.

3) “What would your friends look like if they were zombies?” This is actually answerable because of the Walking Dead app: “Dead Yourself”. Check it out. It’s kinda creepy. My brother uses this to zombify his friends/family/pets. He’s currently making a photo album of all these people for when the big day does occur he will be prepared with pictures. “Excuse me, sir… Have you seen my dog? He may look like this or this…”

4) “Why doesn’t a zombie walk stumble into a McDonalds and scarf down 22 big macs, 17 orders of fries and DIET coke. (This is key because they need to keep their killer figure).” -Josh  (currently unanswered)

What other questions do you have about the apocalypse?

*note: Very few Colombians know the movie “The Princess Bride”. This is a huge problem.